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Demi has written 9 reviews for films rated .

  • Cats

    Cats

    I have no fucking clue what this movie was. It's like if Robert Zemeckis directed an Aristocats movie in 2004. It looks absolutely ghastly, the music is extremely off-putting, the effects literally aren't finished and glitch out in a few places, and there's an uncomfortable horniness to the entire thing that makes it feel like an exercise in loopholing the MPAA to rate fetish porn for kids. This is the highest budget experimental film ever made.

    I had a fucking blast.…

  • 6 Underground

    6 Underground

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    a series of notes i took while building stuff as 6 underground played in the background:

    • Bay has definitely been watching Neveldine and Taylor movies
    • There is an incredible satire about how billionaires ruin countless innocent lives in the pursuit of power and a fantastical idea of “the greater good” somewhere in the bones of this movie. But like, waaaaay deep in there.
    • Jesus Christ the callousness with which people in this movie die... seeing bodies go limp…

  • It Chapter Two

    It Chapter Two

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    It has been a looooong time since I disliked a big studio blockbuster as much as I disliked this one. The script is awful, the balance of humor and horror is so fucking slapdash and without concern for really nailing one or the other, and so much of this movie feels like Muschietti really wanted to sit in the theater next to a 15 year old watching it so he could lean over with a smirk and go "Pretty fucked…

  • Gotti

    Gotti

    Started joking about this movie at a party so we put it on and had a blast shit talking it the whole time. And for that, I can give it exactly one star.

  • Deadpool 2

    Deadpool 2

    This is like a narcissistic and self-congratulatory Superhero Movie (2008). This is like a $110 million feature-length NewGrounds flash animation. This is a lazily-written superhero movie made for and by people who love (and fear?) CinemaSins, and think calling attention to your own cliches (but still doing them) and pandering to your audience with hackneyed references is ‘clever’. This sucks.

    The only part I came close to loving (not just liking- LOVING!) was Domino’s first action sequence, and they even had…

  • Bright

    Bright

    People are trying to defend this movie by saying "at least it's ambitious." It's not ambitious in any sense. It's formulaic, predictable, and terribly written by filling in the blanks to a million other cop movies, but with "Cop #2" find-and-replaced by "orc."

    The dialogue is awful, the movie has the subtlety of a firework, it's shot poorly, the magic in the world has absolutely no rules to it and is wasted in this universe as a macguffin– even the…

  • Red Dawn

    Red Dawn

    Woof.

  • First Daughter

    First Daughter

    I really need to stop watching movies at 3 in the morning just because they're on TV. They are rarely good.

  • The Change-Up

    The Change-Up

    This is probably one of the most stressful films I have ever watched. It's awful, and despite it being under 90 minutes, it just felt so long. I wouldn't recommend this to anybody under pretty much any circumstance.