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  • An Elephant Sitting Still

    An Elephant Sitting Still

    So the thing about nihilistic, slow cinema is that the ones that resonate most with me (Hard to be a God, Satantango, etc) do so because of a contradiction between their crushingly bleak nature and the beauty in their design. In other words, the contrast between how awful humans are and the metafictional truth that humans created the fantastic piece of art I'm watching gives me this...well the feeling doesn't really have a word, but it's a magical feeling.


  • What Did Jack Do?

    What Did Jack Do?


    Didn't really work for me, but happy birthday, King ❤️

Popular reviews

  • Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker

    Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker


    Star Wars Ranked

    The year is 2077.

    Deep under the remnants of what was once considered a city, a lively crowd gathers in a dark-lit holographic theater. Over the last 30 years, humanity has gradually started to recover from Water War II. For some reason, capitalism is still a thing.

    The lights dim as the onlookers go silent. Suddenly, a logo appears onscreen: SMAR WARF

    The crowd goes bananas. Someone in the back row quietly dies.

    The camera pans across…

  • The Irishman

    The Irishman

    Lmao what the fuck?

    I understood the hype around Parasite, and even like it a lot myself, but now yall are just trippin.

    This is Scorsese taking damn near 4 hours in 2019 to say what Godfather said about 50 years ago. It's entirely derivative in form and execution. I can anticipate the argument that the cold and lifeless feel is the point, but I've absolutely seen that done in a way that still manages to be engaging and innovative.…